Anemones are strange creatures. Sometimes they take on strange shapes and show strange behavior for no apparent reason. As long as they aren't spewing out its insides (usually dark brown or red "mucus") I wouldn't worry much about it. Not to say that its not getting optimum conditions, but when they start spewing you really know that you have a problem. I have seen them shrivel up and show like what your pictures show and look perfect the next day and continue to do well.
We have a lot of anemones in our care among several maintenance accounts. We do not feed any of our nems that I am aware of. I also do not feed any that I personally have. From what I have read (I will try to find the source if requested, its been a while since I read up on nems) their metabolisms are dependent on their care. In other words, if they are fed all the time, their metabolisms are then set to require feeding to survive. If they are not fed all the time then they will receive most/all their energy from their symbiotic zooxanthellae.
Its not bad to feed your nems and I am sure it can really help them grow and split, just know that your nem will get accustomed to and require feedings should you start to spot feed. I would contact the person you got the nem from and find out their care regimen and try to replicate it.